Nothing to Report!
by ParabolicHamartia
Summary: Guarding Garreg Mach Monastery is a sacred and important task. Good thing it is left in the most capable hands of the Gatekeeper. However, the post comes with its share of trials and stories to tell. What goes on in the day-to-day duty of Garreg Mach Monastery's security?


The Professor

He had probably the most important station in the entirety of Garreg Mach Monastery. The front gate that separated the market place from the grand entrance hall was the key point that divided the world from one of the holiest places in all of Fódlan. It was up to the gatekeeper to ensure no enemies of the church or those who wished ill will entered its sacred grounds. The gatekeeper stood vigilant watch for hours every day. Years of training and experience had earned him the privilege to stand guard over the monastery. Even though he had only been on the job for about six months, he was sure on his way to becoming the most vigilant among his peers. He wanted more than anything to become the greatest gatekeeper in the monastery's history.

So, with chipper attitude and having done his morning warm ups to keep limber, he made his way over to his post to relieve the other guard who took up another one third of the daily shift. The hours were long, but the crisp morning spring air allowed him a moment wakeful sobriety to start his morning. After taking that moment, he surveyed the scene below him. Down the stone steps was the marketplace; already it was teeming with merchants, students, and knights bartering in the streets. The gatekeeper searched the crowd for potential threats but eased after a few minutes. Everything was positively normal today.

Then a new face appeared in the crowd and walked towards the gate separating the market and grand entrance hall. The gatekeeper narrowed his eyes to inspect the new person. He used his quick wit to immediately deduce that this was not a simple merchant. Then he saw the dark teal hair and black outfit, and he identified the stranger as the new professor. New blood in the monastery faculty was a rare sight indeed, especially concerning the new professor's background as a mercenary. The gatekeeper had briefly introduced himself and spoken to the professor, but other than that, he hadn't had much contact thus far. He wasn't even sure the professor remembered his name. The professor glanced briefly at him as if in greeting. Thinking this was his moment to make an impression on the newest member of the monastery, the gatekeeper spoke up.

"Greetings professor!" He announced loudly. "Nothing to report!"

The professor stopped and stared at the gatekeeper. The Gatekeeper stiffened, Byleth's emotionless gaze always tended to unsettle him. It was no doubt something the ex-mercenary had learned over years of dealing with malicious figures. The gaze held enough stone-cold pressure to crack a walnut. Still, the gatekeeper did enjoy talking to Byleth. Most other higher officials would have nodded politely and continued on their way; that was not so with the professor. Then again, there was always the fact that the professor seemed to pay attention to everything, even if it was a little too much.

Though he had nothing to report, he felt the need to keep rambling, "I heard that the kitchen is serving up Almyran Pine Needle Tea with dinner tonight! I'm definitely looking forward to it. I've secretly heard that it's Felix's—er—Young Lord Fraldarius's favorite tea, but don't tell him I told you."

He smiled boldly as the professor continued to study him. The chilling, emotionless gaze didn't cease for a instant. Then, after several moments of still, the professor simply nodded politely and disappeared into the entrance hall. The gatekeeper exhaled and realized he had been holding his breath for the last portion of their "conversation." He used the exhale to sigh dejectedly.

The conversation could have gone better. The gatekeeper frowned as he went over the event in his mind. How foolish of him to continue. Who cared about tea? He knocked his helmet in a bout of petty punishment. Now the professor was bound to think that he was an idiot or a blatherskite—probably both. Neither of those labels would bode well for his perceived performance.

He cringed at the worst-case-scenario. What if the professor talked or complained about the situation? Would he be reprimanded? Would he lose his position? Why had he been so arrogant as to think Byleth would even want to talk to him? The professor could have been miffed at him by the end. That stony expression left much to the imagination in terms of thought. He wanted to apologize, but if he left his station, he would be in much more trouble than he was now. All he could do was sit and wait until the end of his watch.

* * *

Some hours later and after scripting and practicing an apology in his head, the gatekeeper was rocking back and forth from his heels to his toes. He was trying to keep at attention and work a knot out of his feet at the same time. Though he was used to long days of nothing but standing guard, he still would get soreness in his feet and legs; and the budding anxiety in his chest wasn't helping. Just a few more hours and he could make things right with the professor.

He allowed his mind to drift for a single moment, and he gazed at the sky above where lazy clouds had formed. When he shook himself from the heavenly scenery and returned his gaze to the earth, he was startled by the sudden appearance of cold blue eyes.

"Greetings professor! Nothing to report!" The gatekeeper stiffened to suppress a jump; he couldn't let the professor know that he had forsaken his sacred duty for even a second.

He squirmed a little under the gaze. Byleth never seemed to be in a hurry for conversation and often left pockets of silence where someone else would fill in with small talk. The gatekeeper often wondered if the professor simply was debating what to say or secretly enjoyed making people squirm. He dared not say anything else—not even his rehearsed apology.

_"Oh goddess, please let Professor Byleth move on quickly,"_ he swiftly prayed quietly though he didn't know whether the goddess took into account awkward social interactions as top priority.

Finally, the professor spoke and broke the silence.

"Thank you," the professor nodded curtly.

The gatekeeper stiffened, "Oh, for what, professor?"

There wasn't a long pause this time, "Your advice was effective. Felix has been a particularly hard student to instruct. Having a talk with him over his favorite cup of tea helped me break through his shell."

Then Byleth's face did something strange. A spasm started at the corner of the mouth until a small smile crossed the professor's face. It was awkward, unpracticed, and still didn't completely reach the eyes but was surprisingly genuine and held a sense of warmth. The "Ashened Demon" actually smiled at him.

"I couldn't have done it without your advice. If you have anything else you know about the students, I would appreciate it immensely. Thank you again," the professor nodded quickly and took leave down towards the fishing pond.

The gatekeeper blinked for a moment; he was absolutely stunned by what had just happened. Finally, he allowed himself to relax. The professor hadn't been angry or annoyed with him at all. He had actually _helped _the professor. He had broken through the stony exterior and seen a bit of the person inside. He had once again aided in supporting the day to day of the church and its students. But, most importantly, he had gotten the professor to smile.

The gatekeeper beamed for the last hours of his shift: all in a day's work.

* * *

**This fic will be a series of one-shot-ish stories of encounters between the students and faculty and everyone's favorite cheery gate guard. I'll keep out of spoiler territory as much as possible, and I'll keep to before the time skip. I also might focus on Blue Lions students first because those are the students I'm most familiar with.**

**Also, I intentionally left Byleth's gender out of the chapter. That is because I want you, the audience, to decide whether I should write in MByleth or FByleth. I personally have no preference and it probably won't have too much of an effect on the story, but it should be fun to see what you guys think about it! So, tell me which one in the comments!**

**I put a poll up on my profile or you can just answer in the comments.**

**Also, I will also take suggestions for what the lovable gatekeeper is named—because I don't want to type out "gatekeeper" each time for his name. I'm partial to Garen, because it means guard, but I'm willing to accept other suggestions. I'll eventually do a poll on that one as well after I accrue some names.**

**Thank you for reading!**


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